Prediction: Future Joy #16

The Parks and Recreation Department fits Elizabethan collars on trees at open carparks.

New homes

[Published on 9 August, 1997]

PUNGGOL 21
This model HDB new town is so popular that a separate queue has been
set up for it. It will have 48,000 HDB flats and 32,000 private homes by the sea.





CHANGI POINT
The place has its own unique laid-back atmosphere. Five hundred more
houses or low-rise flats are slated. Recreational facilities will be
improved. More chalets are in the works as well.





BUKIT BATOK
URA has proposed hillside condominiums and stepped housing and
houses on stilts in its future plans for the area.





TURF CLUB
When the Turf Club moves to Kranji next year, the estimated 4,000 new homes
that can be built in the prime residential enclave will be a sure bet with buyers.





NEW DOWNTOWN
City-living comes alive. Some 26,000 new homes spoilt for choice of
views: by the park, along the waterfront or in the heart of the new
Central Business District.

Thief with skin problem?

[Published on 6 April, 1998]
The shoplifter either had a terrible case of the blackheads or was headed for
the black market. Because, hey, why else would anyone pop off with 360 boxes
of Kao Biore Pore Pack?
"I cannot understand why anyone would want to steal so many boxes of the
product," said a security officer at the NTUC outlet in Thomson Plaza.
The Pore Pack, a popular peel-off plaster that removes blackheads, costs
between $3.20 and $5.90 each, depending on the number of plasters in each
pack. Stolen: $1,983 worth of them.
Going by the security officer's suspicions, the theft occurred practically
under his nose that night.
He thinks that two men made off with the packs. "I was observing them.
Then I got a call that I was needed at the delivery bay. When I came back
five minutes later, the whole shelf was cleared of the product," he said.

New telemedicine service soon

[Published on 16 April, 1998]
The doctor is in - in your home, that is.
People will be able to consult their neighbourhood doctor for advice on
minor ailments, from their homes, over the high-speed SingaporeOne
online network.
That is when a trial video-conferencing medical assistance service begins.
With this new telemedicine service, a patient can arrange to "meet" his
general practitioner online and show him such symptoms as a rash and a sore
throat.
Under the doctor's supervision, a patient can take his temperature,
blood pressure or blood sugar readings. These readings can help the doctor
decide if the patient should come to the clinic, or be referred to a specialist.

When telemedicine service starts

More Singaporeans are consulting their doctors via telemedicine
with easy-to-use videophones from the comfort of their homes...

Telemedicine service: the real benefit

... which means, no more waiting at the A&E Department.

Cartoon Caption Contest, 16 November 2008


The shortlisted ones:
"In line with Singapore's Graciousness Drive,
you have to clean up all your hair from the floor before leaving."
- Long Shu Fen

"Sorry. I had too much beans last night."
-Kerwin Low

"Hmm, your hair is very suitable to make into a wig for me."
- Kelly Chang

"Since there is a financial crisis, be like me:
we can save on shampoo!"
- Wong Siok Hui

Many many participants played on similar themes such as:
- The barber forgot his glasses,
- The barber was formerly a grass-cutter, and
- The barber was a student of Sweeny Todd.

And the winning entry:
"Retrenchment?!
Before I leave I will destroy everything!"
- Jasbir Singh

Cartoon Caption Contest, 02 November 2008



The one which won:
"Not tonight. So stop popping your sex pill."
- Chan Mun Chee

The one which was shortlisted:
"Make sure this is the last time you wet yourself!"
- M. Mahindran

The one which many, many people sent in
(about 99.5% of all the participants!):

"Did you see my denture which I put in that glass?"

Do try and think differently...
the next winner could be you.

Pretty money


Flowerpod is a beauty/fashion online community in Singapore. It has kindly
pooled its one-time registration fee of S$12 from new members and
donated the entire gorgeous sum of S$1,500 to help Thien Nhan.
Thanks very much to Flowerpod's Admin, Eric Lim, for making this possible.

Avert your eyes! You are not supposed to see this!!

It is illegal to take part in an illegal assembly or procession in Singapore.
Two men who joined a protest against rising prices were arrested and fined
for the offence. I was so inspired by this news item that I based one of my
Sunday comic strips on it. Unfortunately it was banned from being published
(as with all toons on Singapore's judicial system)... but luckily, there is the
internet where I can still show it to you:



Speaking of our judicial system, the outcome of two different court cases had
left me extremely befuddled. I have condensed them in a comparative chart below:



I'm not saying that kissing a lady's hand without her consent is okay --
but 6 months as opposed to only 2 for actually harming someone??
Am I missing something?

Cartoon Caption Contest, 26 October 2008



The winning entry:

"Looking for a full chest? Call 1800-BREAST-IMPLANTS."
- Hew May Leng

The shortlisted ones:
"Send $10,000 to claim the treasure...
sounds like another Nigerian scam."
-Quek Seow Khoon

"I'm leaving you for Captain Bushbeard, baby.
He has got a bigger ship, two strong legs plus ALL of your gold!
-- Your beloved ex-wife, Sarah."
- Chen Zhengyong

"I need this more than you do
-- Johnny Debt."
- Kelvin Soh Weixian

"An IOU note! Looks like our money was taken to bail out some banks!"
- Yio Wei Cong

"What? 1 Bonus Point for NTUC premium dinnerware redemption!"
- Ron Sim Yew Wah

Could have won...
"Thank you. Please try again."
- Wong Lee Chan
...but, thing is, there were many captions similar to it.

Don't expose magic secrets

[Published on 29 June, 1998]
After a local TV screened the show Breaking The Magician's Code,
it received a protest letter from the Singapore Association of Magicians,
to which the TV station replied that the exposures depicted are of
"entertainment value" to viewers and that magic secrets are already
available to all and sundry in the public libraries.

Here is an excerpt of a follow-up response from the president of
the International Magicians Society:

"The reply given shows a wanton disregard for magic as a performing art and
condonement for the exposure of magic secrets for the sake of increased TV
viewership.
Ethics aside, the TV station has knowingly damaged the rice bowls of many
professional and semi-professional magicians in Singapore.
We all know about how canned applause, laughter, sound effects, aerial
fighting, and gun battles are engineered in the movie industry.
But should all these "secrets" be exposed in the name of public
entertainment?
Like music, opera, painting, ballet, juggling, clowning and mimicking, magic
is an age-old performing art.
Apart from breaking rice bowls, exposure of magic secrets takes the wonder
and fun out of the art."

Prediction: Future Joy #15

HDB blocks are coated with Teflon-treated paint.
Since Teflon surfaces are slippery and nothing sticks to them,
loansharks can't deface common areas with spray cans or markers.


(Idea inspired by Al Jaffee of MAD magazine)

Euthanasia. Yes? No?


Opinions from some folks on the street...
(...and the cartoons in this section are a reflection of mine).

MELVYN TAY, 21
Student
"Morally, euthanasia is hard to justify, but I’m agreeable to it overall.
If I
were terminally ill, I would opt to die painlessly."

JAMES HIGHFIELD, 56
Research chemist
"It goes against my religious beliefs. We shouldn’t assume to displace
what has
been planned for us. Life is a gift."

LILI OSMAN, 29
Civil servant
"I feel that life is sacred but euthanasia should still be an available option.
Checks need to be put in place to prevent loopholes arising.
There should be
counselling services for those thinking of doing it."

ELIZABETH TAN, 57
Retiree
"I’m okay with it, provided people are fully informed
and understand the
implications of their actions.
It’s a quality-of-life issue for the suffering person."


FAIZ JAAFAR, 38
Sales assistant
"I think it should not be allowed. Even with those who are really sick,
we should not be encouraging them to die faster."

TAN IM CHONG, 72
Retiree
"I think it’s a good idea to allow it. Unless you give the person a choice,
you
might just be prolonging their agony.
There should still be strict regulations
on who gets to opt for euthanasia."

HO KOON BENG, 47
Renovation contractor
"It’s hard to say. For family members of the terminally ill,
they may want to
let their loved one go peacefully.
It’s still a difficult decision to make on behalf
of others and
we should definitely consider carefully before we make any laws."


LALITHA SURYANARAYANAM, 40
Homemaker
"When someone is in deep pain, it’s only the wearer
of that shoe who feels it.
If that person wants relief,
he should be allowed to get it."