The winning entry:
"During my heyday selling pirated VCDs in the 90s,
I was actually clocking better timings than Usain Bolt..."
- Keith Chong Kee Seng
The shortlisted ones:
"Be patient. This is the Olympics,
so you would expect a 'Marathon Commercial'."
- Linda Lo Chee Yong
"Why am I here every night?
My doctor advised me to take up as many sports as I can."
- Stephen See
"See, I told you Olympics don't have horse racing,
you don't believe."
- Ang Ah Kiok
"My wife is complaining that sitting here all day
drinking beer is turning me into an Olympig."
- Chua Shi Min
